(Gyne’colo’gist), noun: A doctor who specializes in health care for women, especially with the diagnosis and treatment of disorders affecting the female reproductive organs.
At a typical visit with this type of doctor:
He or she will great you warmly,
perhaps tell you about their medical qualifications,
and maybe introduce you to an assistant nurse.
They’ll make sure you’re nice and comfortable.
Then, they’ll start asking some pretty personal questions, such as:
When was your last menstruation cycle?
How often do you engage in sexual activity?
Do you always use protection?
couldbeanythingthereforenothing:
Things I want to see. ^
GINGER AGAINST GINGER
MAN WHO IS NOT GINGER AGAINST MAN WHO IS NOT GINGER
MAN WHO CANNOT DIE AGAINST MAN WHO KEEPS ON HAVING DINNER DATES WITH DEATH
(Source: avengersaccumulate, via captainhollyshort)
(via totalspiffage)
Dearest darlingest future me,
‘Ello! How are you? Err, how is me? How will me be? Wait, don’t answer that: spoilers. Anywayyy, right now I’m a bit bored in the TARDIS. Must be Sunday. So, I thought I’d try out the ‘ol advanced poetry degree (remember, the one we earned during our artsy-fartsy phase? What with the cat pin and the outrageous jacket? Oh gosh, don’t tell me that future me is wearing that again. Or worse, a flamboyant hat.) Welllll, on to the poetry:Rose isn’t dead.
The TARDIS is blue.
Bananas are sweet.
Raxacoricofallapatorius..
Oh Captain! My Captain Jack! Our fearful TARDIS trip is done.
Your eyes have explored every female’s rack, the man meat you sought was won.
Two timelines diverged in an open vortex, and I-
I took the one more traveled by,
so that I didn’t accidentally destroy all of Time, Space and reality itself.
To be, or not to be - Wellllllll, that is a really pretentious question, as
‘ol Willy thought himself.
Whether ‘tis Donna Nobler in the mind to suffer a two-way meta-crisis…
Do I like green eggs and ham?
I do not like them, Tenth Doctor I am.
Do you like green eggs?
I don’t know. Maybe my Eleventh self likes spam or jam or clams or grahams or rack of lamb. Or even taking a physical exam while eating canned yams with someone named Jam and scoring a grand slam. Dammmmn.
I do not know about him yet, Tenth Doctor I am.
Shall I compare thee to a summer’s day?
Nahh, in most atmospheres, I prefer spring, thank you. Not too cold, not too hot, and all you need is a light jacket.
This poetry thing isn’t working out so brilliantly, is it? I suppose I’ll try another day. Stay clever, self!
Does it need saying?,
*Insert endless squiggly crop circles that I can’t quite write out with this measly Earth-made feather pen here*
For the love of all that’s sacred here in the Tumblrverse, this is one of the greatest things I’ve ever seen.
(Source: flapperorslapper)
supermegafoxyawesomedarrencriss:
Look in the background.
It’s the Doctor.
OH MY GOD.
Just bringing this back.
OMG. It is The Doctor !
THE DOCTOR!!
Shit.
OMFG !!
TEN!
What are you doing there?
WHAA?!?
DEAD.
“I should not have tried those sweets Rose offered me…”
I DON’T KNOW WHAT TO THINK ABOUT ANYTHING OR ANYONE ANY MORE.
DOCTOR WHAT ARE YOU
I DON’T EVEN KNOW
(Source: jeanprouvaires, via captainhollyshort)
Sherlock and Doctor Who: Here’s The Difference
Here’s the Difference:
The Doctor Who photo features a tall, slender, rather alien genius-boy running alongside a medical professional who is smitten with him.
The Sherlock photo……..Oh. OH.
Yes, but Sherlock has a long coat which billows out behind him when he runs.
The Doctor just ha-
…
Oh.
Never mind.
Yes but Sherlock wears tight fitting suits and is smarter than your average human.
The Doctor’s just—
Riiight….
Yes, but in Doctor Who, the medical companion risks death in an attempt to save the lead character from the clutches of an evil, psychotic genius.
Wheras in Sherlock…. um……. Oh..
Yeah, but the Doctor Who companion jumps on board to help the lead even though she knows almost nothing about him and trusts him to solve their current problem that wasn’t even an issue until he arrived.
While In Sherlock… huh.
The title of the chapter when Barty Crouch Jr. dies: The Parting Of The Ways
The title of David Tennant’s first episode of Doctor Who: The Parting Of The Ways
I just checked and it’s 100% true!!
AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAA
(Source: awhiffofamortentia, via captainhollyshort)
Doctor Who rewritten - Barney Stinson as the Doctor’s part-time companion
Are you there, Lord of Time? It’s me, Barney. What up! Listen, pinstripe-suit up and meet me at MacLaren’s, ASAP. There’s a pack of cheerleaders here, blonde humans mostly, possible parental issues - just your type. I think they’ll be impressed by the power of a certain vibrating tool of yours. Yeah, yeah, I know it doesn’t do wood, but these co-eds will do it for ya, if you know what I’m saying. That’s right - I’m thinking you’ll offer up the usual “Waa, waa, woe is me, I’m the last of my kind and me and my friend here” - that’s me, by the way, I’ll introduce myself as ‘The Master’ - “need your human lady-bits to help repopulate the species” shtick. They’ll be granting us exclusive access to journey within their bigger-on-the-inside boxes in no time. Oh, and bring your brainy specs - ya know the ladies love ‘em - and get ready to knock four times on a bedpost, John Stiff. Tonight’s gonna get your big balls plenty of sexy-oh-yes-y…stuff. And might I say, it’s gonna be legen- wait for it and sorry it’s not a nutrient found in bananas (though yours will be pleasured tonight) because it’s - dairy. LEGENDARY. See ya soon, most hung bro in all the bedrooms.
ALL THE AWARDS. EVERY LAST ONE! This is legen - wait for it - dary!
PLEASE.
OMG. ALL THE AWARDS. I CAN’T EVEN.
(Source: doctorgleewho, via textsfromthetardis)
greetings-from-the-underworld:
This is the most beautiful thing I’ve ever seen.
OH MY GOD DO THE WHOLE THING PLEASE
OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD. OH MY GOD.
I need more of this in my life.
(Source: fragilelilmongoose)
(Source: demonsandaliens, via doctorwho)
Gynecologist
